Kris Aquino diaries: Her last days with President Cory (Part 3 of 5)

The third installment in Kris Aquino’s retelling of her last moments with her mother, President Cory Aquino, brings readers back to when she signed legal documents stating "no resuscitation for the patient" should the worst happen, and of the hidden meaning behind the flower, Stargazers.

“July 22, Wednesday. Her pain was so much worse. Nag-insert na kami ng catheter kasi hirap na siya tumayo to be able to go to the bathroom.

“ I asked her, ‘Mom, what do you want?’

“Yung last na [sinabi niya na] very clear talaga: ‘Family.’

“So, I said, ‘I’ll call all of them mom.’

“The doctors told us ‘Everything you want to say now, please say it.’


“Nag-sorry ako. I said, “Mom, for all those times when I was not the daughter you wanted, I’m sorry. I promise you, Mom, I’ll always share sa mga kapatid ko.’

“And then I asked her, because she’s always worried pag nababalitaan niyang nag-aaway kami ni James, ‘Mom, do you want us to get married in church?’ She said yes.

“Then I said ‘Gusto mo same anniversary as yours?’ She said Yes.

“And then I said, ‘Alam ko… ang mga kapatid ko… they don’t like kampanya. [But] I promise you, for the remainder of Noy’s political career [na]aalagaan ko si Noy. Inaako ko yon sa yo, Mom.’

“Kasi that time that Noy was campaigning for the Senate, I was bedridden. So, kung anuman ang gagawin ni Noy sa future, I told mom I’ll be there.

“Then we called Ate. Then everybody was allowed there [and] we were praying. Everybody was able to say ‘thank you.’ And Noy was able to tell her that we were okay.

“Later that night, when they all left, ako [na] lang mag-isa ulit. She called the nurses at sabi niya, ‘Tawagin n’yo si Kris.’ So, I went near her.

“And then mom said, ‘Kris…I love you.’

“She said, ‘Please, sabihin mo sa kanila, tama na.’

“I knew that night was the turning point. So, the next day - Thursday, July 23 - si Dr. Francis again was explaining to me, ‘Kris, yung Demerol na binibigay sa mom [mo]… yung level n’yan can lead to a seizure.’

“‘The only way to stop the Demerol and move on to morphine is if we stop the nutrition. She’d be hydrated with the IV fluid, but we’d stop the nutrition.

“And then he told me, ‘Your family…are you prepared dahil… baka hindi mo na siya [Cory] makausap.’

“I said, ‘I have to call. I can’t make that decision ng ako lang. I’ll call one of my sisters.’

“I was able to talk to Pinky and…they said, ‘Is there no way na ituloy natin yung nutrition with the morphine ?’ And I explained to them na hindi pwede kasi isa lang ang pinagdadaanan. They said, ‘Okay, Kris.’

“Before you are able to do that, kelangang pumirma ng papeles. The hospital gave me papers about no resuscitation, no life support kapag terminal ang case… at may mahabang explanasyon dun because of our Roman Catholic faith.

“I signed…I signed the papers.

“I was alone when they were changing from…feeding to the normal IV fluid to the morphine, and I was praying using her rosary, the one that sister Lucia gave her from Fatima.

“And I was praying, ‘God, please, help me to have made the right decision. Help mom, please.’

“I kept saying, ‘Mama Mary, ni-promise mo through all the messages that have been given to us, that you’re embracing mom. Please embrace her now.’

“We were told from the time na lumipat kami dun [sa kwarto], na critical every 72 hours ang babantayan mo...every 72 hours kasi dun daw nagbabago ang vital signs.

“Eto po yung hanggang ngayon di ko maintindihan kasi walang medical explanation: She was on morphine, she was on Dormicum… but the night that everybody was there, and when everybody had left, it was [just] Ate and me, I joked, ‘Mom, kami talaga ni Ate ang favorite mo.’

“And she said, ‘Hay naku, lahat kayo favorite [ko].’ And Ate was beside her.

“Lahat ng gamot was inside her, so dapat tulog siya [Cory]. But she forced herself [to stay up]. I don’t know if it was will power, or gusto n’yang ipaabot kay Ate how much she appreciated Ate.

“Mom looked at Ate and she said, ‘Thank you.’

“It was the only time that Ate was able to tell her - sinabi ni Ate sa kanya, ‘Mom, remember when I said that I wasn’t okay yet…but I want you to be happy with Dad, no matter how sad we’re gonna be. Pipilitin namin maging okay because that’s how much I love you.’

“And Ate said, ‘I love you super duper, Mom.’

“Kaming dalawa lang ni Ate ang andun. And I know how much courage it took my Ate to be able to say that because si Ate was the one beside her through it all.

“And then Ate excused herself because she broke down. And mom was looking at me, as if telling me, ‘i-comfort mo ang Ate mo.’

“I just have to say this: Our family has been so blessed to have our Ate. Siya talaga ang nag aabsorb ng lahat - siya ang voice of reason.

“It was the next day, July 24, Friday, when we allowed close friends to see her. I won’t name them, pero pumayag kami na lumapit sila.

“July 25, Saturday. I…was asked kung okay lang ba pumunta si Tessie – that’s my Tita Tessie Oreta. Those who follow politics know that for awhile, hindi kami okay.

“I said, ‘Sure.’ In a way, I saw it as closure for the family. It’s a lesson that family should go beyond politics. Namulat yon sa mata ko sa mga panahon na yon.

“I don’t know what Tita Tessie was able to tell Mom. But she told me that the reason she went was the night before, she dreamt of dad.

“Napanaginipan daw niya si Daddy ko saying, “Tessie, puntahan mo si Cory [at] dalhan mo ng Stargazers na bulaklak.’

“So she asked me, ‘Mahilig ba ang Mom mo sa Stargazer?’

“I said, ‘Hindi masyado. She likes looking at flowers but because of her asthma, nahihirapan [siya kapag] matagalan.’

“And then Boy [Abunda] came. I don’t know what he told mom, but I am assuming that he told her na hindi niya ako iiwan kasi hindi niya talaga ako iniwan.

“James came home early. [Kasi] he asked me kung kailangan ko na siyang umuwi.

“I said, ‘Oo’ and he said ‘Uuwi ako para sa gabi may kasama ka.’ The RP team allowed him to leave earlier.

And he said, ‘Gusto mo bang ituloy ko ang paglaro?’

Then I said, ‘Babes, alam mo naman how important the RP team is to mom so dapat ituloy mo.’”

“July 26, Sunday. We had mass. Fr. [Catalino] Arevalo said mass by mom’s bed side, and that was the time all of us broke down.

“Dun ko naalala na, ‘Mom, alam mo, sa dinami-dami ng prinomise ko sa yo, I forgot to promise you na every night, kwe-kwentuhan pa rin kita. I promise you [that] every night before I sleep [ay] kwe-kwentuhan kita kung ano ang nangyari sa akin at lahat ng nangyari sa famiy.

“‘And even in heaven, I ‘ll really try my best to continue making you aliw.

The last physical thing my mom was able to do was to hold Josh’s hand. Kasi sabi ni Josh sa kanya, “Lola holding hands.” And that was the point na kahit blanket lang ang tumama kay mom, nasasaktan siya. Yung konting hawak lang, umaaray na siya.

“Pero nag-reach out siya and she held Josh’s hand. Nagholding hand sila ni Josh talaga.

“And I told her, ‘Mom, ikaw na ang bahala kay Josh. When you’re in heaven, please make sure he’ll be okay. It will be very hard for him to understand kung bakit wala ka na.’

“Josh would pee kasi nuong time na nasa morphine stage na kami. Josh would start crying and throwing up in the bathroom kasi di niya ma-process ang feeling.

“And I said, 'Mom, you know that among all of us, it will be harder on Josh so, please, please take care of him.'”

Source: http://ph.yahoo.com

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